Child Custody Mediation Tips

Summary

In Maine, you can document inconsistencies and present them in court, request the court to allow witnesses, and report suspected fraud to DHS and IRS. During mediation, stay calm, present your facts clearly, and keep your childs best interests in mind. Submitting a statement involves writing a clear, concise statement with relevant facts, signing and dating it, and submitting it to the court clerks office. Focus on key points like past behaviors, current issues, your role as the primary caregiver, concerns about the other partys influence, support from family, and willingness for cooperative parenting.

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Clarify what i cant see rest of message?
Apologies for the confusion. To clarify, you have the right to:
- Document inconsistencies and present them in court.
- Request the court to allow witnesses.
- Report suspected fraud to DHS and IRS.
We need to know if you have specific queries within these points.
So i wrote a whole thing of what has happened but idk if i could turn it into the judge to full explain everything or what for next hearing or what to say during mediation.
In Maine, you can submit a written statement to the court, but it should be concise and relevant. During mediation, it's important to stay calm, present your facts clearly, and listen to the other party. Keep your child's best interests in mind.
How exactly do i submit a statement? Ill send what i wrote down and please tell me if i should send it.
Submitting a statement in Maine typically involves these steps:
- Write a clear, concise statement with relevant facts.
- Sign and date the statement.
- Submit it to the court clerk's office.
Please send what you've written so we can review it.
I have a lot of things to talk about and last hearing I feel that I wasn't saying things in the right place or properly due to being sleep deprived. I am not trying to keep my child away from his mother, which is obvious. I love my child and he needs his mom I still have love for her too. I'm just not in love with her anymore. She brought up communication last time and I brought up how it's been argumentative. Now recently it's been better but within the time before the last hearing. She was trying to stir the pot with my girlfriend Jasmin. Making threats and accusations. Now I have others counting on me for this case. Jordyns Nana, her mom, my dad. Because they know I'm a good dad. Jordyn knows I'm a great father. I love being a father but there's so much behind all of this all where Jordyn has just been in and out when she wants. Her mother had taken her time to write me a * page statement just to find out that I can't turn it into you. That statement explains everything and since i cant turn that in she asked me if i could request a zoom call somehow. Jordyn has laughed before the last hearing at sceenshots saying screenshots can't be used in court. Along with her stepmother that is stirring the pot. I can prove from the last hearing she has even lied to you your honor about her phone being off. It was off yes but until may 7th. Now I don't have the evidence with me but I do have the contact of who is paying for her phone that can state and get me proof if needed. That would be her nana which stated if needed we can call verizon for records of proof if necessary. Our hearing was the 31st. Also, the car crash she had mentioned on why she wasn't around... your honor this was all happening long before that and after. Jordyn has been super inconsistent without any cares. There's so much to talk about. My girlfriend jas who she is going to say she doesn't trust. She liked her plenty not that long ago. We have been her rides and everything with trying to have Jordyn see Jace. Even when we picked her up to visit she didn't seem to care much... she was just taking off and claim she couldn't handle it. Even behind her stepmother's back who is behind a lot of stuff due to this case. She would have me come and grab Jace early so she could run off to go see her boyfriends and have fun. Jordyn never liked her stepmother in all the yrs I was with her. Jordyns brother is with my first ex of * yrs. She didn't even want her daughter who I had been taken care of with her since * she didn't want her around her. Karen has been trying to find ways to team us against and take the children for herself. When me and Jordyn split up due to her getting in contact with her stepmother again and cheating on me. She had got into drugs hanging around with her brother. She actually had overdosed at her stepmother's house and was brought to the hospital. There was times I'd reach out to Jordyn to bring Jace to hospital with me as I don't drive and she had a vehicle I had paid the down payment for. She didn't help. I have been providing for Jace without a job without jordyns help now for some years. I do what I can to make ends meet. We had an agreement before we split whre I offered to find another job due to my job closing down. She wanted more hours and then she cheated on me with a coworker. I had tried to make it work for her for the kids sake. Her crash, she crashed her car and left the scene never reported it or anything. Around the same time we hit a deer. It was in November I remember cause I was trying to plan Thanksgiving. Jordyn always steals our son for all holidays. I barely ever get to spend holidays with our son. Even his birthday. She took him then after I was planning everything out for a big party with her Nana, stepmother, her there. She threw it away cause my girlfriend was going to be there. This scares me about getting a job too. Not just trying to work around her hours but! What if I work and I let my girlfriend watch my son nearby. I've filled out an application for low income housing in bangor with my girlfriend. We're just waiting. So if Jace is with my girlfriend waiting at their friends house that lives in bangor. I feel like jordyns going to have a huge problem with my girlfriend watching Jace. Yet I don't trust her stepmother at all and she's okay to watch Jace while jordyns at work and pick him up alone. I have never once refused Jace from his mother. Ever. Though her and her stepmother act as if I had. They're both beyond manipulative and it's all been a whole drama game. I'm tired of it all. So is her mom that has been supporting with sending her money from Ireland for years and her Nana. She barely even asks how her daughters doing with her Nana. Her and Karen just mentally abuse her daughter. Tell her that she has absolutely no say or anything. They won't even let me see her daughter now and I have been a father to that child since she was * and even kept her at my house after Jordyn and I split. I see her as my daughter still. She's very upset about this as am I. She is * now. She neglected her daughter pretty much with her Nana who had her for 6 months now and I've been here with Jace. She comes and goes as she pleases and recently I put a stop to her trying to walk around my father's house all through the rooms like she owns the place. Have even tried to get her to come and grab her stuff for a few yrs now and she's refused until recently at her stepmother's house. Still hasn't got the rest of her stuff. Also, when she lived with me she was hardly even at my house. She just cared about boys and riding around all night. She was never home. I would fight with her to stay with her daughter. She has attacked me over it in the past for me telling her I was going to tell the boy she was seeings mom what was really happening. Dhs had taken pics of my face where she tried to claw me. Her daughter doesn't even want to live with her that's staying with her Nana right now but doesn't know how to tell her mom. That's possibly another case coming soon between her and her Nana. Her Nana and mom don't get along with jordyns step-mom. Jordyns dad cheated on the step-mom and had Jordyn with another guy. Jordyn had been committing fraud... I recently had gone to dhhs to get Jace on food stamps Jordyn has been collecting for both children and hasn't even been around. She did it with taxes too. This yr she did send me some taxes for Jace to help. She's been playing victim and I've been doing nothing but trying to work things out and right this whole time. All Jordyn has cared about is partners, her phone and drugs. I've even tried to help her get into rehab. Which brings us back to her stepmother. Jordyn was refusing and looking for the easy route. Her stepmother knowing she could manipulate decided to take Jordyn in as jordyns grandmother had kicked her out of her house and Jordyn was here there and everywhere using. Jordyn still wants to be with me and claims we are married so on and so on. I have recordings of when I was just trying to keep it civil between us and about our son and she can't respect my new relationship. She's always trying to stir the pot. There was one incident I was going to drop off Jace to her and she was threatening to slash my girlfriends tires and make her run out of gas. It's all been a journey and it's so much it's tiring. Jordyn has been mentally abusive and physically. She'd hit me with stuff while trying to work on our relationship and everything and this is why I had kicked her out. I had enough. She was constantly seeing other men. Jordyn has told me and her mom she didn't want responsibility for either of her children. She has told me numerous times just take them and has even thought about suicide. She has anger problems and blames everybody else for everything and has talked about suicide over and over. I feel as if she doesn't care about boundaries. I don't feel any of this drama is needed for the children's sake. We all need to work together as a team. I am trying to just keep it civil truly and maybe it didn't come off as that during my last hearing but my anxiety, being thrown off by Jordyn there as she said she wasn't doing the phone call beforehand and being sleep deprived. I was having trouble. My brain just didn't want to function correctly. I just couldn't think of what I had wanted to say. She's also been trying to make me jealous with her new boyfriend that's in a motorcycle club and everything. Knowing my son loves motorcycles. I told her it doesn't bother me. I feel I'm telling her everything about our son because she just doesn't know because she hasn't been around much. Has even asked if he even knows her as his mom. I'm trying to get her to be a mom and have been. I feel she's only doing it now because she got served and her stepmother is making her as she's living under her roof. I have an idea Jordyn doesn't even want to be there. Jordyn being here there and everywhere. Who knows if she's even gonna stay there that long. Regardless of all that deep down, I remember how Jordyn used to be and I know that Jordyn does love Jace but at the same time I feel like she's not capable of taking care of Jace much alone. I have had our son Jace since the beginning me and Jordyn split in *. My father and girlfriend help me out with things I need for Jace as well. I make sure he has clothes, food, baths, makes it to his appointments etc. Jordyn before last hearing told me she was told she was told she could be a lawyer and good luck in bringing her to court. Jordyn was threatening me with court over and over to try and take Jace away from me. Even at one point said she'd make up saying I abused him. Another thing is I don't know if Jordyn is still into drugs. Her mom recommended having a hair test if possible due to her addiction to crack cocaine. She requested Jace for last court hearing, her family had told me I should refuse it. Again I don't refuse Jordyn as I was told I am not allowed even when she was on drugs. I'm asking for primary residence so I know she won't just take our son and take off. It's to have more trust with eachother and for the simple fact that I have had him since the beginning. She's also still using mine and her nanas address on stuff. She's still getting mail here.
Your statement is quite detailed and addresses several issues. However, consider organizing it into key points, such as:
- Past behaviors of concern (drug use, negligence, etc.).
- Current issues (fraudulent behavior, address misuse, etc.).
- Your role as the primary caregiver.
- Your concerns about the other party's influence on your child.
- The support you have from your family and girlfriend.
- Your willingness for cooperative parenting.
Remember to be concise and stick to the facts.
Okay so can you type it out that way for me?
Sure, here's a more organized version:
*. **Past Behaviors**: Jordyn has struggled with drug use, neglect of our son, and concerning interactions with her family. She has often left our child in my care while pursuing other interests.
*. **Current Issues**: Jordyn seems to be committing fraud by keeping our son on her benefits while he lives with me. She's also still using my and her nana's addresses.
*. **Primary Caregiver Role**: Since our split in *, I have been our son's primary caregiver, with help from my father and girlfriend.
*. **Concerns**: I worry about Jordyn's ongoing influence and unpredictability, as well as the involvement of her stepmother.
*. **Support**: My family, girlfriend, and Jordyn's own family members support my bid for primary residence due to my consistent role in our son's life.
*. **Cooperative Parenting**: Despite our issues, I still want Jordyn involved in our son's life and am open to cooperative parenting.
Remember, it's crucial to stick to the facts and avoid personal attacks or unnecessary details.
So should i add anything else?
Your statement seems comprehensive and covers all key points. However, if there are any legal documents, such as reports from DHS or statements from people who can support your claims, consider having them ready. Remember, the judge's main concern is the child's best interest.
How about her threats to my girlfriend. She mentioned we needed communication in last hearing but! She has been super argumentative over phone.
You can include this in the "Current Issues" section. If there are any documented threats or instances of hostile communication, they could be relevant. However, be sure to focus on how these issues impact your child's well-being and stability.
I just feel that what you wrote up doesnt include everything. Im so nervous.
I understand your anxiety, it's a complex situation. To address this, consider writing down any additional points or concerns you think we may have missed. It's also helpful to practice what you'll say in mediation or court with a trusted friend or family member. Is there anything else you'd like to include in the statement?